Big Fat Ostrich

Ok, I finished digesting that whole thing of blackberry yogurt that I ate. Seriously, man. When you set out to eat a whole 750 grams of yogurt in one sitting, be prepared for the consequences. It’s not like you can just go, “yeah, let’s eat the whole thing”, and then just walk away from the table without consequence.

It’s like playing poker. When you win a huge pot and take everyone’s money, do you just get up and say, “great game, guys! Same time next week?”, and then just stroll out to your Harley? Do you? Well, you could do that, but you better have a backup plan in case things turn ugly.

Well I played my cards right. This time. I went for a solid bike ride AND I went jogging beforehand. Yeah, that’s right. When you do that, your body will be hungry and will absorb all of that yogurty goodness.

But you can’t just go for a 10 minute run. Make it a good honest 20 minutes. And for the bike ride, do at least 30 minutes, with no less than 15 minutes riding uphill. Yeah, that yogurt will go right to your quads. Do those things and you too will be able to eat 750 grams of yogurt in one sitting.

However, if you do not exercise beforehand, you’re going to ruin that new pair of boxers with a lot of blackberry yogurt juice. And it’ll be more than 750 grams, if you know what I mean *wink*

So yeah! Join me next week when I try to eat 12 apricots in one sitting!

Dell are such a bunch of jerks, but D-Link runs a close second. Yeah, I kind of hinted at that awhile back, but now I’m trying to return my D-Link DIR-615, which is a huge piece of crap. So even though I love my Inspiron, I hate Dell for making me call D-Link, especially since I bought the thing from them.

So I called those D-Link guys:
“I want to return the router!”
“ok sir, I will work on your replacement.”
“No. I want to return it.”
“Yes, I will replace it.”
“Return!”
“Replace.”
“RETURN!”
“Replace, yes.”

Anyway, while we were talking, the line disconnected. When they tried calling me back twice, the line was silent both times. Like they were stalking me or something. They suck. I didn’t even hear any heavy breathing.

So I’ll try to live with it for another 24 hours. If it keeps on dropping connections, I’ll get them to replace it.

For now, I’m gonna eat an entire thing of Liberty Blackberry Yogurt. Have you ever tried it? It fucking rocks.

Yeah man, Blackberry Dude would be proud.

Yeah!