Big Fat Ostrich

Welcome to another edition of Unintelligible Wednesdays, where I try to post something when I have no energy to do so.

I did see Watchmen finally, and it was awesome. Really it was. The only thing about writing a review for Unintelligible Wednesdays, and about such a great movie, is that I risk destroying the spirit of it with a crappy review.

So I’ll review JCVD instead!

JCVD stars Jean-Claude Van Damme, ex-fighter extraordinaire, action hero, and all around great guy. He plays himself as a washed-up action hero, stuck with half-assed roles in half-assed movies. In JCVD, he’s still fighting, but for custody of his daughter! As the box says, it’s “The Biggest Fight Of His Life!”.

It was actually pretty good. The film takes place in his native Belgium where he’s treated as a hero. The locals adore him, a native (and famous!) Belgian son. But then, he gets caught up in a small time robbery, and hey, washed up actors need cash to maintain that Hollywood lifestyle. Is he guilty? Did he do it? Watch and see.

I gave it 7 Internetz on 10

Yeah, it might be a new feature!

Since I always post pure gold, I though I’d slack today. Yes, that’s right. No topic, no direction, no nothins. Hell, not even spell checsk. Terrible englishe, etcetsr.

But somehow I feel guilty about it. I can’t give up my punctuation. I can feel that virtual ruler coming down to mangle my fingers like my 1st grade teacher used to do to me. Fine, we didn’t get The Ruler as kids. It’s just me living vicariously through my father. His generation got it bad.

Actually, speaking of unintelligible, something odd happened as I was on my way to get myself a Pad Thai this evening.  I passed a small group standing in front of a hotel, when this early 20′s dude walks up to them all cool-like wearing a winter hat and all. He asks one of them for a smoke, lights it, says, “you folks from around here?”, and then promptly collapses on the sidewalk. Immediately, one of them asks, “Hey, are you ok?” to which he responds, “uh, no” as he struggles with gravity to return to a standing position. The small group retreats back into the hotel while Winter Hat kid props himself against the wall and then takes another drag from his smoke.

Good thing the doorman was there. As for myself, my Pad Thai was awesome.